It’s ME, Miss Rosie Bum Keane and please don’t snigger because that is MY name.

At least my big sister Pilly says so and she also says that it is not nice to make fun of names and I think I should take the advice of a girl called ‘Pilly’ seriously on that point. After all, my other sister seems to be called Gemmaguts.

Anyway, here’s the thing, Internet.

That wasn’t very nice to go sticking needles in my drumsticks.

Not one bit.

I am not very impressed and you better not do it again, mama lady, or I will give even worse Hurt Shock Face and Shrieking.

Also, it hurts now whenever I move my drumsticks and I can’t help when I move them and it kind of seems to be a lot and that is why I have been an utter grizzle bum and it is all the fault of the needles.

I think I’ll throw in a little light fever for good measure.

Now remember what I told you all, Internet. No more sharp things in MY drumsticks.

I’m glad we had this little chat,

Miss R Bum.

Dear Internet,

Did you know it’s something called Somer?

Well it IS Somer-time and you can thank us for informing you of Somer-times because Somer-time means certain really good most nice things.

1. Less Tights

2. More being chased with the hose in the backyard where the water police cannot see us.

3. Lots of picnics out on the deck because Mama seems to think that never sleeping makes cleaning up after us even more unappealing than you’d think and will go to some lengths to feed the birds by accident of inaccurate toddler avoid it.

4. Oh, and these things called icey poles.

They might just be the most important bit of Somer-time.

Yes, even BETTER than an ‘Im so PROUD of YOU’ for a direct unprompted potty run.

The other good thing about Somer-time, Internet, just quietly is that if you haves a tiny accimadent while a bit too excited running on the grass after your icey pole, nobody gets especially upset.

Somer-time is kind of fun.

Love,

Lily and Gemma who are always on the look out for the next icey pole and might just be a tiny bit whiny at times in pursuit of same.

It is Miss Pilly here today and really you should only be seeing me in the following photos from a careful distance.

Mama says she is very sorry indeed and she has learned her lesson.

Se says she has refrained from printing any of the offending photos and we’ll just all pretend it never happened.

Being a kind Mama, she also took rather a lot of photos from my only Good Angle for about a month after the Thing With The Scissors.

Thank you, Mama.

 Do you see what I mean?

Gemma would like to point out that SHE has never had such a problem.

 Nyah!

I likes my Fringe anyways and that includes even when it almost doesn’t exist.

Love,

Pilly who calls a piano a ‘yanno’ and a guitar a ‘tar’. Gemgems would like to point out that a ‘tar’ should be called a ‘dee dar’ but mama just smiles when we haves that particular discussion. I have no idea why.

It is Gemma AND Lily AND Rosie here blogging today way waaay up past Mama’s New Baby bedtime, mostly on accounts of she felt a bit guilty that we hadn’t got all online to tell you all about the delightful things we’ve been doing lately.

Mama says if she waits a week, she just remembers the worst of the toddler meltdowns and forgets the sweet bits and that is a shame because we do sweet as well as we do meltdowns.

We do meltdowns VERY well, in case you weren’t clear on that last point.

Anyway, we wanted to tell you about Rosie Bum and how much we loves Rosie Bum and how we would cuddle Rosie Bum and feed her from our own feeding bits all day if we could and before you look slightly startled, we know how babies get their milk.

We are very observant and most enlightened toddlers and aren’t afraid to explain it all to you in the supermarket. At length.

Poor Mama.

Attention to detail is what we DO, Internet, and we have a special knack for the kinds of detail that grownups don’t want us to see or hear and THAT is why we get all curious about the more interesting Driving Words available.

But it’s all okay in the end, Internet, because we wouldn’t want to set a bad example to Rosie Bum and that’s why Mama is working very hard indeed on saying ‘duck’ rather than the version starting two letters along when Driving.

We don’t get the joke.

Love,

L+G+R

It’s Gemma GemGems here today, and don’t ask but I have Decided that I now answer to GemGems and will correct you if you try and call me GEMMA , oh yes I will.

I wanted to tell you all about how I was a clever girl and used the WC all day in creche today without one single teeny tiny accident despite all the fun distracting toys and games but instead Mama says I have to tell you about something Lily did today because Mama wants to remember when we are older and more adolescent and disagreeable.

 You see, Lily told Mama this morning that she loved Mama very much and that Mama was her best Mama. She also said she loved Rosie lots and lots and that Rosie was very mostest cute and when Mama brought Rosie to creche at the end of the day Lily was delighted because she had missed ‘Rosie Bum’ very much indeed.

Lily can be such a sop.

I gave Rosie my dum dum. I reckon that means more than a million zillion missed very muches.

Love,

Gemgems.

It’s Gemma here today and do excuse the motion blur on my feets that you might have not noticed had Mama accidentally not hopped into my writings to point it out and mutter about shutter speeds in low light conditions and how she should have faffed with the aperture or caved and used the flash or some such rubbish, but ANYWAY.

I am a helper Big Girl, oh yes I am!

I am NOT a baby because Rosie is the baby and I wear knickers (sometimes, when I am not going all bottomless to remind me about the virtues of the potty because Mama says she is not having with three children in bleeping nappies and she really says ‘bleeping’ pronounced kind of differently as some sort of special grown-up word that we are not allowed to repeats, too).

Rosie just has lots of accidents in her pants, and I reckon Mama is being pretty jolly patient with her right now. I know better, because I am now Big and I NEVER do accidents.

I am also a WONDERFUL helper and you only have to see me help rock and kiss and cuddle the baby to sleeps to see my Helps.

Actually, Mama says that both Pilly and I are most excellent with Rosie and still seem inclined to keeps her and we do rock her rocker rather well and sooner or later we shall get the advanced diploma in Newborn Thy Shall Take Thy Pacifier.

We currently only do the apprentice version, Thy Shall Open Mouth and Have Pacifier Briefly Enlocated Before Inevitable Spit.

But on the other hand, we do still think our plastic cookies might become magically edible if we but try them opportunistically enough. It could be a while before we gets the hang of things.

At least we go POTTY by ourselves, though.

Love,

Gemma.

It’s Gemma here.

I’m a BIG sister.

First time I’ve ever been called a BIG anything and Mama says it is going to my head a little.

I like Rosie. I can blame the smells on her. Can we keep her?

Love,

Gemma.

It is Gemma and Miss Pilly here today and we have been sent to bed good and early on accounts of something to do with a hosti-pal tomorrow.

The way WE tell it, the baby is going to hatch.

It’s just like the chickens at daycare, right?

Love,

Pilly and Gemma who will be safely playing with fingerpaint at aforementioned daycare at hatch o’clock.

It is Miss Gemma here today and I wanted to show you pictures of something terribly important.

ME!

Sitting at the table having a lunchtime conference with Lily and eating something other than plain toast, weeties, rice crackers or rice cakes.

Oh well, never mind, you can never get ALL the details right, you know.

Love and kisses and possibly the odd tantrum when things do not come in the Green Bowl as requested,

Gemma

It is Miss Gemma and ONLY GEMMA here today and I am writing on accounts of I have learned something called ‘mild subterfuge’.

Ignore Lily. It’s all about ME today.

Not only can I really, truly read medical magazines entirely upside down, but I can ALSO pretend to yawn and go to sleeps when it is Bedtime and I still have the urge to play quietly with my toys in my cot.

Mama says that if it wasn’t for the secret hour of Gemma to Bear conversation that goes on afterwards on the monitor, she’d NEVER know my saying ‘YAAAAAWWWN, I am so tired, goodnight Mummy, I’m sleeping now, hurrungh-pffffttt, hurrungh-pffffttt, hurrungh-pfffftt,’ was all an act.

Aren’t I clever?

Love,

Gemma.